Jesus said to his disciples: "Things that cause people to stumble are bound to come, but woe to anyone through whom they come. It would be better for them to be thrown into the sea with a millstone tied around their neck than to cause one of these little ones to stumble. So watch yourselves." (v.1-3)
It appears that Jesus was directing this warning at the religious leaders who taught their converts their own hypocritical ways. Human nature being what it is, there will always be occasions that can cause us to stumble. However, Jesus makes it plain that it is a serious thing to cause a fellow believer to stumble or to tempt them to sin.
The Apostle Paul tells us in 1 Corinthians 8 to be sensitive to others, as our actions may inadvertently cause a weaker brother to stumble when we are taking our own liberty. He warns us to beware lest someone see our liberty and it becomes a stumbling block to them. Therefore, we should lovingly watch over each other, learn to understand each other's weaknesses and do all that we can to keep one another from stumbling into sin.
Jesus goes on to say in verse 4, if someone stumbles you, deal with it and forgive them. Meaning, when someone sins against you, you should not pretend that it never happened. You need to rebuke that brother or sister in love. Love is the rule here; we obviously can’t walk around keeping a record of every little offense committed against us. One aspect of the fruit of the Spirit is longsuffering (Galatians 5:22), and we need to be able to suffer long with the slights and petty offences that come our way in daily living. Ephesians 4:2 says that we should love with longsuffering, bearing with one another in love. Don’t be too sensitive; bear with one another.
But in love, when we are sinned against in a significant way, we must follow Ephesians 4:15 as the pattern: we need to speak the truth in love. Love isn’t going to other people about it; love isn’t bottling it up inside of you. Love is getting it straight with the person who sinned against you. Then, if he/she repents, forgive him: This is the challenge from Jesus. There is no other option given. When the person who offended you repents, you must forgive them.
Now the question is, What do we do with the person who has never repented? Do we forgive them? Even if relationship cannot be restored because no common mind is arrived at, we can still choose to forgive them on our part, and wait for a work of God in their life for the restoration of relationship.
Jesus went on to say, "And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and seven times in a day returns to you, saying, “I repent,” you shall forgive him." This indicates that we are not permitted to judge another’s repentance. If someone had sinned against me seven times in a day, and kept asking me to forgive them, I might think that they were not really sincere. Yet Jesus commands me to still forgive them and restore them.
Clearly Jesus commands us to forgive and not to hold grudges. This is not a simple task, and it may take time depending on the depth of the wound but, we must seek peace in our hearts and ask the Spirit to help us forgive.
The Truth: Then Peter came to Him and said, ”LORD, how often shall my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? Up to seventy times? Jesus said to him, I do not say to you up to seventy times, but up to seventy times seven." (Matthew 18:21-22)
